


Planet of the Dead REVISED

by betawho



Series: Revised Episodes [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Adventure, Gen, Science Fiction, revision
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-11
Updated: 2013-09-11
Packaged: 2017-12-26 08:24:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/963754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/betawho/pseuds/betawho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I thought Planet of the Dead was a great episode, but I was bothered a bit by the level of camp, plot holes, and Doctor Worship that pervaded the story. I decided to see if I could edit the story to tone down the camp, and give some better explanations for the plot holes, while still keeping it an engaging story...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Planet of the Dead REVISED

**Author's Note:**

> This is just my version, written to my preferences. I like the fun, edge of your seat adventures. All copyrights belong to Russell T. Davies and the BBC. I simply did it as an editing exercise, for my own interest and edification, no infringement was intended. But I thought the other writer's here might be interested in seeing the results.
> 
> The story is written in transcript style. All the dialogue is there, but with minimal description. It assumes you've seen the episode and can envision this from those images. If you notice any dialogue missing, it's because it's been deliberately edited out.

 

  
Planet of the Dead Revised

By Russell T. Davis (Revisions by betawho)

 

Opening scene - Establishing shots of the outside of the museum, with the bus turning the corner in the background. 

Interior Museum - Four night guards arrive, talking casually, crisply dressed and professional, but relaxed and casually twirling their torches. 

They approach a central display, an elaborate golden chalice on a marble plinth. It is surrounded by four electronic poles. 

Guard Commander: "Positions boys."

The four guards unlimber their guns and take up positions at all four corners, instantly becoming professional. The Guard Commander throws a master switch and a laser fence of bright blue beams rises up between the four poles, surrounding the chalice. As the fence beams reach the top, lights at the top of the poles come on, and a grid of deadly laser beams seals the top of the cage.

Guard Commander: "Good night."

 

The camera pans upward, where a hatch in the domed ceiling opens, revealing a black garbed cat burglar. The female burglar dives slowly down on guy wires, soundless. She stops, just above the laser grid top of the cage, the guards all standing mere feet away, looking outward, unaware of her behind and above them. 

She surveys the deadly cage, hanging upside down, and carefully pulls loose a pair of high tension threads from a spool on her belt. She carefully lowers the threads down through the central square formed by the crisscrossing laser beams. Gingerly, working upside down, she separates the strings, revealing the hooks on the ends. With practiced ease she slips the hooks, one each, into the loops of the chalice's handles. Silently, careful not to brush the strings against the edge of the laser beams, she picks up the slack and transfers both stings to one hand. With the other hand she loosens a pouch from her belt and, using another string, lowers it down level with the chalice. With a practiced flick, she picks up the chalice and drops the pouch at the same time, transferring the weight with no shift to set off the alarms. 

Grinning in triumph she leaves that string connected to her belt and gathers up the other two strings, reeling the chalice up. As it reaches the grid, it becomes obvious that while the strings attached to the cup handles can fit through the square gap, the handles themselves are too wide. She stops for a moment, then gently rotates the cup 45 degrees and slips it up through the grid, the handles slipping through in the corners. 

She hits the controls on her belt and ascends, jauntily releasing the thread to the pouch on the plinth below. The thread spirals silently down through the grid, down to the ground, allowing the pouch to fall open, leaving a gleaming ebony stone cat sitting, grinning, on the plinth. A black bead, sewn conspicuously into the top of the pouch, clinks as the pouch falls open and hits the glass top of the plinth. A guard turns to look. 

The cat burglar emerges on the roof as alarms go off. She seals the hatch silently and reaches up to pull off her hood. She grins with exhilaration and runs across the rooftops, sliding down the fire escape ladder to land in the alley, she turns the corner and sees her partner at the getaway car, already being arrested. She ducks back.

Catburglar: "Sorry Lover." 

She turns and runs down the alley in the opposite direction.

She emerges onto the street. Sirens blare and cop cars arrive from every direction. She merges with the crowd looking desperately for an escape. In the background the bus trundles by. The Detective arrives, and she spots the bus.

She jumps aboard.

Catburglar: "Hello. I'm so terribly sorry. That card paying device thing. That's a lobster card, am I right?"

Driver: "Oyster Card."

Catburglar: "Ah, that's the problem, you see. I only use my Oyster when there's an R in the month."

Driver: "It's April."

Catburglar: "Diamonds! Genuine." She puts them in his hand. "Drive."

Driver: "Works for me."

The woman runs to take a seat.

The camera pans past her.

She doesn't notice the man in the back of the bus. A tall, skinny man in a brown striped suit, his feet propped up on the seatback in front of him, munching on pieces of Easter candy as he watches the whirling device in his hand.

An ominous silence segues into - 

Title Music.

Title Sequence.

Street scene, the police looking frantically for the criminal as the bus pulls out behind them.

Detective: "Right, close off the area. Get all these people cleared. She has got to be here somewhere." He looks up and sees the woman on the bus, looking right at him. "She's on the bus!" (excited) "It's definitely her. Get moving! Follow that bus!" They pile into the patrol cars and peel out after the bus, sirens blaring. 

On the bus, the Catburglar looks worriedly behind her at the police cars. Then turns and stares balefully at the impudent feet propped on the seatback so close to her head. The man takes his feet down and sits up, leaning forward over the seatback and offering her his half-eaten Easter egg.

Doctor: "Hello. Happy Easter. Would you like some chocolate? I don't often do Easter. I can never find it. It's always at a different time. I even missed the first one. Though I keep trying." The device in his other hand suddenly starts bleeping. He jumps up and fumbles the device. He sits back down next to her. "Here, hold this." He shoves the gold wrapped candy at her and she automatically takes it. The device bleeps more urgently. He holds it up, studying it. "Oh, we've got excitation! I'm definitely picking up something very strange." 

Catburglar: (gingerly holding the egg) "I know the feeling." She turns to study the cop cars behind them.

—————

Police chase

Detective: (into radio) "All units, in pursuit. Registration, Whiskey, 974, heading for the Gladwell Road Tunnel. Please stop all traffic. Seal off the north end."

________

Police dispatcher: "The bus has entered the south entrance of the tunnel. Officers in pursuit. Units now arriving at the north entrance."

Police cars, lights flashing, pull up at the north end of the tunnel, blocking it off. An officer gets out of his car, reporting over the radio.

Officer: "Tango 183 at the far end, sir. I sealed off the exit. There's no way out."

________

Detective: (in pursuit in the tunnel) "I'm right behind. We've got her."

________

On the bus.

Doctor: "Rhondium particles. That's what I'm looking for. This thing detects them."

Catburglar: "Right now a way out would come in pretty handy. Can you detect me one of those?" 

The bus continues through the tunnel. Whispered voices sound.

Black Woman: "Lou, can you hear them?"

Lou: "Hear what, sweetheart?"

Black Woman: "The voices, so many voices, calling to us. Calling from so far."

The Doctor's detector starts a more excited bleeping, faster, and faster. He leans forward, waving the device around. The device reaches a crescendo.

Doctor: "Woah!" 

It sparks, spraying sparks into the woman's hair in front of him. 

Blond Woman: "Sorry! Do you mind?" She brushes at her hair. 

Doctor: "Sorry, bit of an overload." The device starts bleeping louder, and louder.

Catburglar: "Can't you turn that thing off?"

Doctor: (worried) "What was your name?"

Catburglar: "Christina."

Doctor: "Christina. Hold on tight. Everyone hold ON!"

The bus lurches whipping everyone forward and throwing the Doctor to the floor. 

Black Woman: "The voices! The voices! They're screaming!"

The bus shakes, passengers are tossed around, glass shatters. 

White Boy: "What's going on?"

Blaring white light. A wild shift of focus. More glass shatters and everyone screams. 

\---------

At the police blockade.

Officer: (into radio) "Tango 183. Units in position, sir. Sorry to report, but no sign of the bus."

\-----------

Inside the tunnel.

Detective: (out of his car, staring down an empty tunnel) "It's gone. Right in front of me. The bus is just... gone."

\-------------

A long shot of the tunnel merges into the blurry image of brilliant white light coming in through shattered windows. 

The scene pulls back and focuses. The passengers are tossed every which way, the bus is damaged.

The Doctor, fallen in the aisle, stands slowly up, looking out beyond the bus, at the bright light of what should have been night. Slowly he walks to the door and shoves it open. He steps out, onto sand.

Doctor: "End of the line." The others follow him slowly, shocked. "Call it a hunch. But I think we've gone a little further than Brixton."

(The camera pulls back to show the passengers, the bus, and an endless vista of alien desert.)

\------------

Somewhere - a monitor is showing the survivors. An alien hand points at them and the alien chatters angrily.

\-----------

Back on the bus.

Lou heads for the door. 

Lou: "We've got to get out. Even if that is the Sahara, we can't stay aboard this thing."

Black Woman: "I'm not going out there. They're still calling. All around us. The voices are crying."

Lou: "What voices, sweetheart?"

Black Woman: "The dead. We're surrounded by the dead."

\----------------

Outside, the Doctor examines the alien sand, letting it fall from his fingers.

The other passengers survey the scene. 

Blond Woman: "It's impossible. There are three suns. Three of them."

Black Boy: "Like when all those planets were up in the sky."

White Boy: "But it was the Earth that moved back then, wasn't it?"

Black Boy: "Ah man, we're on another world."

Driver: (examining the bus) "It's still intact though. It's not as bad as it looks. The chassis is still holding together. My boss is gonna murder me."

Blond Woman: "Can you still drive it?"

Driver: "No. Nah. The wheels are stuck. Look at 'em. They're never gonna budge."

___________

Back on Earth, at the police tunnel blockade.

Detective: (talking to Officer) "Dennison, seal up the far end. Nothing is to come through."

Dennison: "I don't understand, sir. How can a bus just disappear?"

_________

Back in the desert. 

Christina pulls a pair of sunglasses from her pack and slips them on. 

Christina: "Ready for every emergency."

The Doctor pulls off his glasses and zaps them with the sonic screwdriver, they turn into sunglasses. He puts them back on.

Doctor: "Me too."

Christina: "So what's your name?"

Doctor: "I'm the Doctor."

Christina: "Name, not rank."

Doctor: "The Doctor."

Christina: "Surname?"

Doctor: "The Doctor." 

Christina: "That's not a name, that's a psychological condition."

Doctor: "Funny sort of sand, this. There's a trace of something else." He touches a bit to his tongue and immediately wants to spit it out. "Yah, yah, yuck. Not good."

Christina: "Well it wouldn't be. It's sand."

Doctor: "No. It tastes like...." He gets up and walks away. "Never mind." 

Christina: "What is it? What's wrong?"

Black Boy comes stalking up. 

Black Boy: "Wait a minute. I saw you. You had that thing, that device. Did you cause this?"

Doctor: "What is it with humans, always blaming me? Look, look, if you must know. I was tracking a hole in the fabric of reality. Call it a hobby. But, it was a tiny little hole, no danger to anyone. Suddenly it gets big and we drive right through it."

Driver: "Then where is it? There's nothing, there's just sand."

Doctor: "All right." The Doctor stalks off toward the back of the bus, the others following. "You want proof. We drove through this." He scoops up a handful of sand and throws it. The air crackles and ripples, revealing a huge weak point in the fabric of space.

\------------

Back on Earth, at the same time, the other side of the wormhole flexes and ripples, startling the policemen who are guarding the tunnel.

Detective: "What the hell was that?"

\----------------

In the desert. 

Christina: "And that's..?"

Doctor: "A door. A door in space."

Driver: "So, what you're saying is, on the other side of that is home. We can get to London through there?"

Doctor: "The bus came through, but we can't."

Driver: "Well then, what are we waiting for? He heads for the wormhole. 

Doctor: "No, no, don't!"

Driver: "I'm going home, mate!" 

Doctor: "Don't!"

The driver steps through the wormhole and screams as his body is reduced to a skeleton, it falls out the other side, terrifying the policemen left guarding the tunnel. 

Black Boy: "He was a skeleton, man! He was bones! Just bones!

\---------

On Earth.

Detective: (still unnerved as the body lies, smoking) "Dennison. I think we're out of our depth here. We need experts. (Into the radio) Get me UNIT. Emergency Code One."

\-----------

In the desert.

Doctor: "The bus. Look at the damage. It was the bus protecting us. A great big box of metal."

Christina: "Rather like a Faraday Cage."

White Boy: "Like in a thunderstorm, yeah? The safest place is inside a car, because the metal conducts the lightning right through. We did it in school."

Christina: "But, if we can only travel back inside the bus... A Faraday Cage needs to be closed. That thing's been ripped wide open."

Doctor: "Slightly different dynamics with a wormhole, there's still enough metal to make it work, I think. I hope."

Christina: "Then we have to drive five tons of bus, which is currently buried in the sand, and we've got nothing but our bare hands. Correct?" 

Doctor: "I'd say nine and a half tons, but the point still stands, yeah."

Christina: "Then we need to apply ourselves to the problem with discipline. Which starts with appointing a leader."

Doctor: "Yes, at last. Thank you. So,"

Christina: "Well, thank goodness you've got me. Everyone do exactly as I say. Inside the bus, immediately."

White Boy: "Is it safe in there?"

Christina: "I don't think anything's safe anymore. But, if it's a choice between baking in there, or roasting out here. I'd say baking is slower. Come on, all of you. Right now. And you, the Doctor."

Doctor: "Yes, ma'am."

________

Inside the bus.

Christina: "Point 5. The crucial thing is do not panic. Quite apart from anything else, the smell of sweat in this thing is approaching atrocious levels. We don't need to add any more. Point 6. Team identification. Names. I'm Christina. This man is apparently the Doctor."

Doctor: "Hello."

Christina: "And you?"

White Boy: "Nathan."

Black Boy: "I'm Barkley."

Blond Woman: "Angela. Angela Whitaker."

Black Man: "My name is Louie, everyone calls me Lou. And this is Carmen." 

Christina: "Excellent. Memorize those names, there might be a test. Point 7. Assessment and application of knowledge. Over to you, the 'The Doctor'."

Doctor: "I thought you were in charge?"

Christina: "I am. And a good leader uses her strengths. You seem to be the brainbox. So, start boxing."

Doctor: "Right. So. The wormhole. We were in the wrong place at the wrong time. It was just an accident."

Carmen: "No. It wasn’t. That thing, the doorway, somebody made it, for a reason."

Doctor: "How do you know?"

Lou: "She's got a gift, ever since she was a little girl, she can just tell things. We do the lottery twice a week."

Christina: "You don't look like millionaires."

Lou: "No. But we win 10 pounds, every week, twice a week, 10 pounds. Don't tell me that's not a gift." 

Doctor: "Tell me, Carmen, how many fingers am I holding up?" (holding up three fingers behind his back.)

Carmen: "Three."

The Doctor holds up another finger. 

Carmen: (unprompted) "Four."

Doctor: "Very good. Low level psychic ability exacerbated by proximity to a dimensional rift. What can you see, Carmen? Tell me what's out there."

Carmen: "Something, something is coming, riding on the wind."

Doctor: "What's coming?"

Carmen: "Death. Death is coming."

Shocked silence.

Barkley: "Ah, I knew it, man I said so!"

Angela: "We're gonna die!"

Everyone panicking and talking at once.

Nathan: "We can't die out here, no one's going to find us."

Christina: "This isn't exactly helping."

Barkley: "Shut up, you don't know what's going on."

Christina: "It's not doing any good."

Angela crying in the background. 

Lou: "Be quiet!"

Everyone yelling at each other.

Doctor: "Stop it! Everyone STOP IT!"

Everyone quiets down, except Angela who is still crying hysterically.

Doctor: "Angela, look at me. Angela? Answer me one question, Angela." (She starts to calm down.) "That's it. Look at me, at me. There we go. Angela, just answer me one thing. When you got on this bus, where were you going?"

Angela: "Doesn't matter now, does it?"

Doctor: "Answer the question."

Angela: "Home, just home."

Doctor: "What's home?"

Angela: (crying again) "Me, and Mike, and Suzanne, our daughter."

Doctor: "Suzanne? Good." (He turns to the others.) "What about you?" (To Barkley)

Barkley: "Dunno. Going round Tina's."

Doctor: "Who's Tina?"

Barkley: "My girlfriend. Maybe." (grins shyly)

The Doctor grins back.

Doctor: "What about you, Nathan?"

Nathan: "Bit strapped for cash. I was just going to stay home, watch TV."

Doctor: (Turning to the married couple.) "And you two?"

Lou: "I was going to cook."

Doctor: "What's for tea?"

Lou: "Chops. Nice couple of chops and gravy. Nothing special."

Doctor: "It sounds good to me. Chops and gravy, mmm. What about you, Christina?"

Christina: "I was going, so far away."

Doctor: (Nodding to each of them in turn.) "Far away. Chops and gravy. Watching TV. Mike and Suzanne. And seeing Tina. Just think of that. Because this isn't the end of the world. This is just a pit stop. That planet out there, three suns, wormholes and alien sand. That's just a planet. Nothing to be scared of. Because we're going to get out of here."

Angela: "How?"

Doctor: "By working together. Come on."

\----------

Back on Earth, UNIT arrives at the tunnel. UNIT vehicles and soldiers quickmarching and deploying. 

Sergeant (voice over): "UNIT Squads, assume positions! Spread out! Deploy armament!"

A female officer gets out of the lead car and stalks toward the tunnel, giving orders as she goes, soldiers peel away from the group one by one to carry them out.

Female Officer: "Isolate the area. Establish an exclusion zone. Any media, move them back, any trouble, arrest them. I want the vehicles in a standard Procedure 5 layout. All outreach officers will report to me via Sergeant Calhoon, is that understood?"

Soldier: "Yes, ma'am."

Detective: "Captain, I'm Detective Inspector McMillan."

Captain: "Clear the area. Thank you."

Detective: "Yes. But I was here when the bus..."

Captain: "I studied your report, now clear the area. Pandofsky, get these men out of here."

Detective: (as he's being herded away) "Yes, but there's somebody on board that bus. She's mine!"

The Captain walks up behind a line of soldiers guarding the tunnel mouth. 

Captain: "Perimeter guard stand ready. Any hostile activity. Shoot to kill."

\-------------  
Back in the desert.

Barkley and Nathan carry the panels of the seats out of the bus. 

Barkley: "Here we go."

Doctor: "Brilliant! We'll lay a flat surface between the bus and the wormhole, like duckboards, and we'll reverse into it."

Christina: "Let some air out of the tires, just a little bit. It spreads the weight of the bus. Gives you more grip against the sand."

Doctor: "Oh, that's good."

Christina: "Holidays in the Kalahari."

Barkley: "Yeah, but those wheels go deep."

Christina: "Then start digging."

Barkley: "With what?"

Christina looks around. The ground is littered with debris from the damaged bus. She finds a metal panel three feet long and a foot wide. She picks it up, shakes off the sand, and stomps on one end, forming a dent down the length. She pulls a pair of pliers out of her backpack and uses them to roll the edges of the other end inward, forming a crude tubular handle and a scoop. She drops the pliers back in her backpack with a clink and hands the homemade shovel to the Doctor. He looks at it with admiration and passes it on to Barkley. 

Doctor: "Got anything else in there?"

Christina: "As a matter of fact," she pulls out a hand ax and hands it to Nathan. "That might help Lou with the seats."

Nathan: "Thanks." 

Angela: (from inside the bus) "I can't find the keys!"

Doctor: (rushing toward the door, where Angela is sitting in the driver's seat.) "Oh, no, no, no, busses don't have keys. There's a master switch, then it's one button for start, the other for stop."

Angela: (finding the buttons) "Right, hold on. Here we go, hold tight. Ding ding." 

She pushes the button, the engine grinds horribly but doesn't start.

Doctor: "Ooh, that doesn't sound good."

The Doctor opens the engine compartment and examines the engine. 

Doctor: "Never mind losing half the top deck, you know what's worse? Sand. Tiny little grains of sand. The engine's clogged up." The Doctor shoves his sleeves up and reaches in to start repairs. Christina has already run around the edge of the bus. 

Christina: "Anyone know mechanics?"

Barkley: "Me. I took a two week course at the garage. Didn't finish it though."

The Doctor looks around the edge of the bus at this encouraging news, surreptitiously shoving his sleeves back down.

Doctor: "Good. Start by stripping the air filter, fast as you can. I'm going to take a look around." He strides off toward the highest sand dune. Christina follows him.

Christina: "Wait a minute. You're the man with all the answers. I'm not letting you out of my sight."

They trudge through the desert.

Doctor: "It'd be easier if you left that backpack behind."

Christina: "Where I go, it goes."

Doctor: "A backpack filled with tools. Christina who's going so far away, yet scared by the sound of sirens . Who are you?" 

Christina: "You can talk. Let's just say, we're two equal mysteries."

They reach the top of a dune.

Christina: "Come on, tell me. If Carmen's right, that wormhole's not an accident. Then what is it? Has someone done this on purpose?"

Doctor: "I don't know. But every single instinct of mine is telling me to get off this planet, right now."

Christina: "Do you think we can?"

Doctor: "I live in hope."

Christina: "That must be nice."

The Doctor looks her over, doubtfully. 

Christina: (holding out her hand to shake) "It's Christina de Souza. To be precise, it's Lady Christina de Souza."

Doctor: (shaking her hand) "That's handy, cause I'm a lord."

Christina: "Seriously? Lord of where?"

Doctor: "Everywhere."

Christina: "You see, that's just it. That device you were carrying. You knew about the wormhole. And you stride around this place, like you own it. Who are you?"

Doctor: "Not important. Come on. Allonz-y!"

Christina: "Oui!"

They crest the top of the next high dune and see a worrying sight. 

Doctor: "I don't like the look of that."

Christina: "Storm clouds. Must be leagues away."

Doctor: "But getting closer."

Christina: "If that's a sand storm, we'll be ripped to shreds."

They look at each other, then run for the bus.

_________

Back on the bus. 

Carmen: (in trance) "Closer, and closer, and closer..."

The Doctor bursts onto the bus.

Doctor: "Where is it?"

Barkley: "There, on the seat."

The Doctor snatches up a cell phone and starts to sonic it.

Christina: "You're hardly going to get a signal, we're on another planet."

Doctor: "Oh, just watch me." He finishes adapting the phone and starts dialing. "Right. Gotta remember the number, very important number."

The phone rings and connects.

Voice on Phone: "Hello, Pizza Geronimo's."

Doctor: (grimacing) "Then again. Seven six, not six seven."

The phone rings as everyone waits with baited breath. 

UNIT Operator (on phone): This is the Unified Intelligence Task Force. Which department would you like."

Doctor: "Listen. This is the Doctor. It's me."

________________

Back on Earth, at the tunnel.

A soldier carries a cell phone to the Captain. 

Soldier: "Captain. Urgent call, Ma'am, relayed direct from HQ."

Captain: "Who is it?"

Soldier: "It's him, ma'am. It's the Doctor."

Flabbergasted, she takes the phone.

Captain: "Doctor? This is Captain Erisa Magumbo." (Saluting.) "Might I say, sir, it's an honor."

Doctor: "Did you just salute?"

Captain: (embarrassed) "No."

Doctor: "Erisa, it's about the bus, HQ said you were at the tunnel. Yeah?"

Captain: "And where are you?"

Doctor: "I'm on the bus. But apart from that, not a clue. (looking out over the desert) Except it's very pretty. And pretty dangerous."

Captain. "A body came through here. Have you sustained any other fatalities?"

Doctor: "No, and we're not going to." He heads toward the front of the bus, settling himself in the privacy of the driver's alcove, away from the prying eyes of the rest of the passengers. "I'm stuck. I haven't got the Tardis and I need to analyze that wormhole."

Captain: "We have a scientific advisor on site. Dr. Malcolm Taylor. Just the man you need, he's a genius."

Captain Magumbo enters the science van, where Dr. Taylor is pouring over his readouts. 

Captain: "It's the Doctor."

Dr. Malcolm Taylor: "Oh, I'm all right now, thanks, it's just a bit of a sore throat. I got to be honest, a cup of tea might be nice."

Captain: (handing him the phone) "No. It's The Doctor."

Malcolm: (awed) "You mean, the Doctor Doctor?" 

Captain: "Yes."

Doctor: (over the phone) "I can hear everything you're saying.

Malcolm takes the phone. 

Malcolm: "Hello Doctor. Oh my goodness!"

Doctor: "Hello Malcolm."

Malcolm: "The Doctor. Cor Blimey! I can't believe I'm actually speaking to you. I've read all the files. You're a legend you are!"

Doctor: "As long as I'm not a dead legend. I need some help sorting out this wormhole."

Malcolm: "Right." Malcolm, buckles down to business. Captain Magumbo presses a button to put the call on speaker phone.

Doctor: "Malcolm, something's not making sense here. I've got a storm and a wormhole and I can't help thinking there's a connection. I need a complete, full range analysis of that wormhole, the whole thing."

Malcolm: "Well, I've probably got the wrong idea, but I've wired up an integrator. I thought it could measure the energy signature."

Doctor: "No, no, no, no, that'll never work. Just listen ...."

Malcolm: "It's quite extraordinary though. I'm measuring an oscillation of fifteen Malcolms per second."

Doctor: "Fifteen what?"

Malcolm: "Fifteen Malcolms, it's my own little term. A wavelength parcel of ten kilohertz operating in four dimensions equals one Malcolm."

Doctor: "You named a unit of measurement after yourself?"

Malcolm: "Well it didn't do Mr. Watt any harm. Furthermore, 100 Malcolms equals a Bernhard."

Doctor: "Who's that? No, never mind. Listen, we need to find a way to... 

Malcolm: "It's been a bugger to analyse. But I've set the scanner to register what it can't detect and inverted the image."

Doctor: "You've done what?"

Malcolm: "Is that wrong?"

Doctor: "No, Malcolm, that's brilliant! So you can actually measure the wormhole? You  _are_  a genius."

Malcolm: (Looking at Magumbo) "Told you."

She rolled her eyes. 

Doctor: "Now, run a capacity scan. I need a full report. Call me back when you've done it."

Malcolm: "Right-O, Doctor." 

The Doctor hangs up and dashes out of the bus, holding up the phone.

Doctor: "Barkley, I'm hanging onto this!"

Barkley: "You better bring it back!"

The Doctor and Christina trudge over the sand dunes, back to where they saw the storm. Unknown to them, the aliens are still monitoring them.

Doctor: "We'll send a picture back to Malcolm, see if he can analyze the storm."

He lines up a shot on Barkley's cell phone. 

Christina: "There's something in those clouds. Something shining. Look."

The Doctor looks, something is glinting in the storm. Thousands of pinpricks of light.

Doctor: "Like metal."

Christina: "Why would there be metal in a storm?"

___________

Back on the bus.

Carmen: "So fast. And strong. They ride the storm. They are the storm."

Lou: "What are they?"

Carmen: "They devour."

___________

 

Back at the top of the dune. Christina hears a clicking sound.

Christina: "Did you hear something?"

Doctor: (fiddling with the cell phone) "Hold on, busy."

Christina: "There was a noise Like a sort of ..." she breaks off, seeing something, we hear more clickings, and a sort of guttural glocking. She sees an alien standing behind them in the dunes, pointing a gun at them. An alien with a fly's head, and a man's body. "Doctor."

The alien comes up to them clicking and glocking. The Doctor answers in its language, a harsh glock and click that stretches his throat.

Doctor: (to Christina) "That means 'Wait'."

Christina: "You speak the language?"

The alien clicks and glocks at them some more, waving the gun.

Christina: "That means move."

Doctor: "Oh, you're learning." They hold their hands up and move.

The fly alien herds them across the desert. 

Christina: "These fly things, they must be responsible. They brought us here."

Doctor: "No, no, no, no." They arrive at the alien ship, a huge hulking mass in the desert, broken in half. "Look at the ship, it's a wreck. They crashed, just like us."

Inside the alien ship, cables dangle, panels hang loose and debris is everywhere. The fly herds the Doctor and Christina through the cluttered corridors. 

Christina: "Ugh! This place is freezing!"

Doctor: "The hull's made of photofene steel. Turns cold when it's hot. Boiling desert outside, freezing ship inside."

 

They arrive in the control room.

Doctor: "Oh, this is beautiful! Intact it must have been magnificent. A real, proper deep spacer."

Christina: "I'll remember that as I'm slowly being tortured. At least I'm bleeding on the floor of a really well designed spaceship."

They meet another of the Fly crew. The fly who brought them picks up a device and attaches it to the front of his jumpsuit. He consults with his crewmate, clicking in his own language.

Doctor: (understanding them and replying in English) "Oh right, good, yes. Hello". (aside to Christina) "That's a translator. He can understand us."

The alien yells off a rift in it's own language.

Christina: "Still sounds like gibberish to me."

Doctor: "That's what I said, he can understand us. It doesn't work the other way around." 

The aliens continue to speak to them, angrily. The Doctor translates for Christina.

Doctor: "You will suffer for your crimes. Etc. Uh, you have committed an act of violence against the Tritovore race. Tritovores. They're called Tritovores. You came here in the 200 to destroy us." (confused) "Sorry, what's the 200?"

Christina: "They mean the bus. Number 200."

Doctor: "Oh! No, no, I think you're making the same mistake Christina did. I'm the Doctor, by the way, and this is Christina. But we got pulled through that wormhole. The 200 doesn't look like that normally. It's broken, just the same as you."

The aliens discuss it among themselves, then lower their guns. 

Christina: "What are they doing?"

Doctor: "They believe me."

Christina: "Just like that?"

Doctor: "I have a very honest face."

She gave him a doubtful look. 

Doctor: "The translator analyzes brainwaves, it confirms I'm telling the truth." She just kept staring at him. "Plus the face!" he assured her. "Right!" he changed the subject. "First things first. There's a very strange storm heading our way. Can you send out a probe?" He looks around and finds the probe controls, he leaps over to them. The aliens clack at him.

Doctor: "Oh, they've lost power." He examines the controls, listening and checking instruments. "The crash knocked the mainline crystallography out of synch. Not a problem, happens in the Tardis all the time. All we have to do is jiggle it back." He grabs the console, braces himself, and gives it a well placed, hearty, kick. It hums back to life. Christina gives him a amazed look. "Molto bene. Now," he examines the controls. "Let's launch that probe." He hits the controls and a probe flies off toward the storm. 

______________

Still inside the alien ship's control room. 

A gaseous nebula floats in the air, a hologram.

Doctor: "The Scorpion Nebula. We're just where you wanted, so far away." The scene changes to a beautiful green and blue globe. "The planet San Helios." 

Christina: "That's us? We're on another world!"

Doctor: "We have been for quite a while."

Christina: "I know, but seeing it like that...."

Doctor: "It's good isn't it?"

Christina: "Wonderful."

The aliens click swiftly at them, explaining the images. 

Doctor: (translating) "The Tritovores were going to trade with San Helios, a population of 100 billion. Plenty of waste matter for them to absorb."

Christina: "By waste matter, you mean..."

Doctor: "They feed off what others leave behind. It's perfectly natural, they are flies."

The hologram changes to a view of a beautiful alien city, lots of flying traffic, gorgeous buildings and lush gardens.

Doctor: "San Helios City."

Christina: "That's amazing. But, you've seen this sort of thing before, haven't you?"

Doctor: "Thousands of times."

Christina: "Where exactly are you a Lord of?"

Doctor: "Of Time. I'm from a race of people called Time Lords."

Christina: "You're an alien?"

Doctor: "Yeah."

Christina: "You look human."

Doctor: "You look Time Lord."

Christina: "Okay. So if that's San Helios, all we've got to do is find the city. They can help us."

Doctor: "I don't think it's that simple."

The aliens chatter at him excitedly, and change the view of the hologram. The city melts away into a view of the desert. 

Doctor: "We're in the city, right now."

Christina: "But it's sand. That first image, the temples and things, what is that, ancient history?"

The aliens click at her, obviously answering. 

Doctor: (translating) "The image was taken last year."

Christina: "It became a desert, in one year?"

The Doctor leans over and scoops up a handful of the ever present sand. 

Doctor: "I said there was something in the sand." It trickles slowly through his fingers, grain by grain. "The city, the oceans, mountains, the wildlife, and a hundred billion people turned to sand. All those voices in Carmen's head, she's hearing them die." The sand drains away. "Something destroyed the whole of San Helios."

The cell phone rings, startling the Doctor out of his reflections. He answers. 

Doctor: "Malcolm, tell me the bad news."

Malcolm: "Oh, you are clever. It is bad news. It's the wormhole, Doctor, it's getting bigger. We've gone way past 100 Bernhards, I haven't invented a name for that!"

Doctor: (his voice over the phone) "How did it get bigger by itself?"

Malcolm: "That's why I'm phoning. We don't know. We were hoping you did." 

Captain Magumbo: "Doctor, we estimate the circumference of the wormhole is now 4 miles, heading upward. I've grounded all flights above London. We can't risk anyone else falling through."

Doctor: "Good work, both of you."

Captain Magumbo: "But, I have to know, does that wormhole constitute a danger to this planet?"

The Doctor's phone beeps. 

Doctor: "Oops, call waiting, sorry, I've got to go."

Captain Magumbo: "Call waiting?"

Malcolm grins.

Doctor: (answering the call) "Yeah."

Nathan, on the bus, the others sitting around him.

Nathan: "Doctor, it's Nathan. We got those duckboard things down but..."

Angela: (distraught) "It's my fault." 

Nathan: "No, it's not. Don't say that."

Doctor: (overhearing) "Why, what's happened?"

Nathan: "We kept on turning the engine, but we're out of petrol. Used all up. Even if we can get those wheels out, this bus is never gonna move."

Slowly, the Doctor hangs up the phone.

Christina: (warned by the look on his face) "What is it? What's wrong? Doctor, tell me, what did he say?"

An alarm goes off in the alien control room, they turn to look. The aliens are excited.

Doctor: "It's the probe, it's reached the storm."

The alien keeps clacking excitedly.

Christina: "What's he saying?"

Doctor: "It's not a storm."

__________

At the edge of the desert the probe flies into a massive front of flying alien creatures, stingrays, looping, flying, swirling over the desert sands. It transmits the image to the ship.

__________

Christina: "It's a swarm. Millions of them."

Doctor: "Billions."

They watch as the probe records the onrushing wave, billions of individual lifeforms, swooping past, until one swoops directly toward the camera, mouth open. And the signal cuts out.

Doctor: "We've lost the probe. I think it got eaten. Everything on this planet gets eaten."

Christina: "How far away is that swarm?"

Doctor: "About 200 miles, at that speed they'll be here in 40 minutes. Not much time."

The Fly aliens chatter agitatedly behind them. 

Doctor: (answering) "No, no, no, they don't just want us. They want the wormhole."

Christina: "They're heading for Earth."

Doctor: "Show the analysis."

The Tritovore hits the controls and a holographic schematic of a stingray pops up, undulating in flight and rotating. 

Doctor: (studying it) "Incredible. They swarm out of a wormhole, strip a planet bare, then move on to the next world and start their life cycle all over again."

Christina: "So, they make the wormholes?"

Doctor: "They must do."

Christina: "But how? They don't exactly look like technicians. And if the wormhole belongs to them, why are they hundreds of miles away?"

Doctor: (to the Tritovores) "Show the energy readings"

The Tritovore hit a switch, and a purple and jagged red aura appears around the image of the stingray. 

Doctor: "I thought so."

Christina: "What?"

Doctor: "Each of those creatures is emitting a low level tachyon field. See? Not much, not enough to do anything on it's own. But the more they eat, the more they breed, until eventually you have millions of them, billions. Each one adding its energy to the whole, creating one huge tachyon field, until eventually they reach a critical mass. The tachyon field interacts with the planet's magnetic field and rips a hole in the fabric of reality. Probably wherever the planet's magnetic field is weakest."

Christina: "And the wormhole's getting bigger."

Doctor: "Because they're getting closer. The tachyon field is feeding the tear, ripping it wider."

Christina: "But how do they get through? That wormhole's a killer, we've seen it."

Doctor: "No, no, look, see the exoskeleton?"

Christina: "Metal?"

Doctor: "They've got bones of metal. They must eat metal and extrude it into the exoskeleton, So their energy field makes the wormhole, then their body makes it safe."

Christina."Those things are going to turn the entire Earth into a desert. So why are you smiling?"

Doctor: "Well, you've gotta admit, that's a beautiful design."

Christina: "You're mad."

Doctor: "So I've been told."

Christina: "The thing is, Doctor. You're missing the obvious."

Doctor: "Which is?"

Christina: "We came here through the wormhole, yes? But our Tritovore friends didn’t. They came here to trade with San Helios. So the question is, why did they crash?"

Doctor: "Good point." (turning to the Tritovores) "Like she said, why did you crash?"

__________

Tritovore engine room. 

A Tritovore runs in, leading the Doctor and Christina. 

Doctor: "Oh yes. Gravity well, look, goes all the way down to the engine." (to the Tritovore) "So what happened?"

The Tritovore clicks in answer.

Doctor: (translating) "He says the drive system stalled. Ten miles up they fell out of the sky." (to the Tritovore) "But what caused that?" 

The alien shrugged.

Christina: "Which means, no idea."

Doctor: "Yeah. But, wait a minute, that's a crystal nucleus down there, yes?" Tritovore clicks an answer. "It looks like it survived the crash. If the crystal's intact... Oh yes! That's better than diesel."

Christina: "What? You can use the crystal to move the bus?"

Doctor: "I think so. The spaceship's a write off, but the 200's small enough."

Christina: "How does a crystal drive a bus?"

Doctor: "In a super clever, outer-spacey way. Just trust me." He brings up an image on the monitor. "There's the crystal, it's fallen to the bottom of the well. Have you got access shafts?" The Tritovore clicks an answer. "All frozen. Well, maybe I can open them. Christina, have you got a phone?"

Christina: "Of course." (she pulls out a bluetooth attachment out of her backpack and hands it to him.)

Doctor: (surprised) "Why didn't you tell me before?"

Christina: "You didn't ask."

Doctor: "Right." (he pulls out his phone) "What's your number?" (She took his phone and dials it in.) "Right," (he handed her headphone back) "You wear that. Keep an eye on the shaft. Tell me if anything happens." He runs out. Christina sits down on the lip of the well and puts on the bluetooth. She looks down into the shaft, and smiles.

____________

The Doctor and the Tritovore run back into the Tritovore control room. 

Doctor: "If we can reroute the ventilation, we can use the heat outside to defrost the access hatches." 

The Doctor tucks the phone between his ear and his shoulder. 

Doctor: "Christina, if you see a panel opening in the shaft, let me know."

Christina: "Nothing yet." She starts buckling on her harness.

Doctor: (frantically cross circuiting systems) "Anything now?"

Christina: "Fraid not." She puts up her hair. 

Doctor: "Any sign of movement?"

Christina: "Nope."

Doctor: "How's that?"

Christina: "Nothing." She hangs up her winch.

Doctor: "Any result?"

Christina: "Not a dickey-bird." She clips her lines to the winch, and to her harness. "So, let me get this right." She takes a small torch out of her backpack and tests it. "You need that crystal." She slips the torch in her belt and is ready. "Then consider it done."

Doctor: "Why? What do you mean?" He keeps examining the connector he is using. Suddenly he realizes something is wrong. "Christina?" She is a woman who could do anything, he's had companions like that before. "Christina!" He runs for the engine room.

She stands at the lip of the well, prepared to jump.

Christina: "The aristocracy survives for a reason." She looks over her shoulder as the Doctor bursts into the room. "We're ready for anything." She spreads her arms and falls.

Doctor: "No!"

The winch unreels and she flies down the shaft. The Doctor whips out the sonic screwdriver and sonics the winch.

Doctor: "Come on, come on, come on." The winch stops. "That's better."

Down below Christina jerks to a halt.

Christina: "I decide when I stop, thank you."

Doctor: "You were about to hit the security grid. Look."

A blue energy grid crackles just beneath her. 

Christina: "Excellent. So what do I do?"

Doctor: "You come back up. I can do that."

Christina: "You wish. Now how do I deactivate this thing?"

Doctor: (resigned) "I'll do it from here. But go slowly." The Doctor works the Tritovore control panel and the grid disappears.

Christina: "Yes sir." She dives slowly downward.

Doctor: "Not much of a listener, are you? Lady Christina de Souza. Carrying a winch in her bag."

Christina: "No stranger than you, 'Time Lord'. I meant to ask, why Time Lord? That's a funny name for a race. How can you be a lord of Time?"

Doctor: "It's because my people developed time travel, eons ago." He started idly going through her backpack."You vacation in the Kalahari. I vacation in history," he finds the cup and pulls it out, "such as in the Court of King Athelstan in 924 A.D. It's funny though, I don't remember you being there. So what are you doing with this?" 

Christina: "Excuse me. But a gentleman never goes through a lady's possessions."

The Tritovore asked the Doctor a question.

Doctor: "It's the Cup of Athelstan. It was given to the first king of Britain as a coronation gift from Howell, King of the Welch. It's been held in the International Gallery for 200 years. Which makes you, Lady Christina," he said, talking into his cell phone, "a thief."

Christina: "I like to think I liberated it."

Doctor: "Don't tell me you need the money."

Christina: "Daddy lost everything, invested his fortune in the Icelandic banks."

Doctor: "No, no, no, no, if you're short of cash you rob a bank. Stealing this, that's a lifestyle."

Christina: "I take it you disapprove."

Doctor: "Absolutely. Except, my time machine, I stole that from my own people."

Christina: "Good boy."

An alien, animal scream echoes up the well.

Christina: "What the blazes was that?"

Doctor: "We never did find out why the ship crashed. Christina, I think you should come back up."

Christina: "Too late, I can see it." Below her the crystal glows in its frame.

Doctor: (to the Tritovore) "Do you have an open vent system?" The Tritovore agreed. "I thought so."

Christina: (reaching the open well at the bottom) "What does that mean?"

Doctor: "It's like when birds fly into the engine of an aircraft."

Below, Christina hears a loud, aspirating hiss. And turns to look, still hanging upside down.

Christina: "One of the creatures."

Doctor: "Got caught in the vents, caused the crash. Christina get out!"

Christina: (watching it) "It's not moving. I think it's injured."

Doctor: "No, it's dormant because it's so cold down there."

Christina: "But it's not cold."

Doctor: (wiping his face in dismay) "That's what I was trying to do, open the ventilation to let in the heat. Get out. Now! Before it wakes up!"

Christina: (fumbling with the crystal) "But I've almost got it."

Doctor: "Don't waste time removing the crystal, just grab the whole plate thing."

Christina: (stretching) "Got it!"

The creature wakes up and the Doctor activates the winch at the same time. Christina rises, just as the stingray lunges after her. She rights herself in the harness, aiming upward, clutching the crystal plate to her chest. The monster flies up after her. The Doctor runs for the Tritovore controls.

Doctor: (watching on the monitor) "Come on, come on, come on. It's going to try to eat her!" Christina arrows up the shaft with the monster rocketing and rebounding below her. It gets too close, snapping at her leg. She kicks it in the nose, knocking it back just enough. The Doctor activates the security grid between them. The monster crashes into it, and is electrocuted. "Oh, she's good."

Christina pops up above the shaft. The Doctor grabs her. 

Doctor: "That's it, that's it. I've got you." He helps her to the edge, where she hands the crystal assembly to the Tritovore. He clicks at her, the Doctor translates. "He's impressed."

They all ran back to the control room.

_______

In the control room. 

Doctor: (to the Tritovore) "Commander, we should get going now. We need to get back to the 200, all of us."

The Tritovore glocked at him.

Doctor: "Oh, don't be so daft. A Captain can abandon his ship, if there's a bus standing by."

There was a sudden crash and a roar.

Christina: "What the hell was that? Is this place safe?" (realizing) "It's the creature, it's not dead."

The Tritovores start talking.

Doctor: "Maybe you didn't hit just one of them. If you hit a swarm ..."

Christina: "Do you mean, if there's more on board?"

Doctor: "This ship is build inside a metal sleeve. They can move through the infrastructure all around us. And those things wake up hungry. Commander, you've gotta come with us, right now!"

Christina: "Come back to Earth with us."

Doctor: "From there I can get you home. Come on!"

The Commander follows them, but his Second stays for a moment to grab something. There is an almighty crash and one of the swarm drops through the ceiling. Debris knocks the Second down, before he can recover the swarm creature eats him. The Commander advances in outrage, weapon raised. 

Doctor: "No, don't!" The Doctor grabs him, and the Commander changes his mind. They all run, the cluttered corridors serving in their favor as they duck and dodge where the swarm creature can't get through.

They burst out into the desert, running as fast as they can. The swarm storms up over the horizon behind them. They have only minutes left. The sound of the swarm's tachyon emissions and flight sound like wind and thunder. The passengers on the bus jump up from their heat stupor. 

Angela: "What sort of storm is that?"

The swarm seeths across the desert, as the Doctor, Christina, and the Tritovore run for safety.

Carmen: "Run, run, run, run, run!"

The fleeing party runs headlong down a dune, struggling to retain their feet as they run for their lives. 

The Doctor's phone rings. He answers it.

Malcolm: (on Earth) "Doctor, I ..."

Doctor: (into phone) "Not now, Malcolm!" He hangs up.

Malcolm: (staring at the phone) "Fair dues." (to Captain Magumbo) "He's a busy man."

The Doctor's party crests the last dune and sprints for the bus. 

Nathan: (with Barkley at the door.) "At last! Where have you been?" He stares at the Tritovore. "And what's that?" 

Doctor: "He's a friend. Get inside, get strapped down." 

The boys run back aboard. The Tritovore steps aboard and everyone gasps and flinches back as he finds a seat.

Outside, the Doctor examines the crystal assembly, disengaging the crystal.

Christina: "What does that crystal do?"

Doctor: "Oh nothing," he tosses it away. "We don't need the crystal." 

Christina: "I risked my life for that!"

Doctor: "No, no, you risked your life for these." He takes apart the assembly. "The clamps." He runs around the bus, placing a clamp on each wheel. "One there. One there. One there. One there." They run into the bus and the Doctor takes over the driver's seat.

Christina: "What are the clamps for? Do they turn the wheels?"

Doctor: "Something like that. Have you got a hammer in that bag?" He startes rigging the center of the assembly to the steering wheel.

Christina: "Funnily enough." She hands him a hammer. He hands her the phone. "Press redial."

She dials and holds the phone to his ear.

Doctor: "Malcolm, it's me."

Malcolm: "I'm ready!"

Doctor: "For what?"

Malcolm: "I don't know, you tell me!"

Doctor: "I'm going to try to get back. But listen, there might be something following us. You need to find a way to close the wormhole."

Malcolm: "Would that be a compressed burst of counter oscillation feedback perchance?"

Doctor: "Oh, Malcolm, you're brilliant."

Malcolm: "Coming from you sir that means the world."

Captain Magumbo: "Doctor, what sort of something? That wormhole is now measuring 10 miles and growing. I need to know the exact nature of the threat."

Doctor: "Sorry, gotta go." He hangs up.

Captain Magumbo: (irritated) "All troops, mobilize and stand ready. Possible Code Red: Unknown."

Sergeant: (outside, receiving the order) "Understood." He mobilizes his troops around the tunnel. "Code Red! Repeat, Code Red! Positions!" Soldiers scramble to the ready. 

__________

Back on the bus.

The Doctor finishes his modifications, but the control assembly fizzles out and refuses to work. 

Doctor: (frustrated) "Ah! It's not compatible. They're designed for two different energy systems. I need something to fuse the two together."

Christina: "And how do you do that?"

Doctor: "I need something conductive, something malleable, something ductile, something ... Gold! 

Christina: "Oh, no you don't"

Doctor: "Christina, what is it worth now?

Barkley: (running up) "Hey, hey, use this!" He offers his watch.

Doctor: "That's too much of an alloy. I need something purer. Christina." He stares her down, and she struggles, but eventually reaches down into her backpack and pulles out the Cup of Athelstan.

Christina: "It's over a thousand years old, worth eighteen million pounds, promise me you'll be careful."

Doctor: "I promise."

He takes the cup carefully, turns it upside down, and begins hammering a chunk out of it.

Christina: "I hate you."

_____________

Back on Earth, in the scientific van, Malcolm finishes his calculations.

Malcolm: "Done it. Transmit that, and the wormhole should close."

Captain Magumbo: "Then do it."

Malcolm: "After the Doctor's come through, obviously."

Captain Magumbo: "I'm sorry. Believe me. But that wormhole constitutes a major threat, and I have a duty to every man, woman, and child on this planet. It's got to be closed immediately."

Malcolm: (muttering) "No, no, no." 

Captain Magumbo: "That's an order."

Malcolm: "No. We can't just abandon him! How many times has the Doctor saved our lives? I won't let you, ma'am. I simply won't."

She pulls a gun and aims it at his head.

Captain Magumbo: "Right now, soldier."

___________

Back on the bus, in the desert.

The Doctor finishes his repairs.

Doctor: "This is your driver speaking. Hold on tight."

Barkley: "Why? What's he doing?"

Christina: "Do as he says." She turns back to the Doctor, who's trying to start the engine. "What are you doing?"

Doctor: (encouraging the bus as it starts) "Come on! You can do it. One last trip."

The bus starts shaking, the sound of dynamos whirring, everyone is holding on tight.

The bus shifts, tilts, and lifts up into the air.

Barkley: "Woah! Look at that! Oh, you are so kidding me!"

The Doctor keeps lifting the bus, going higher and higher as the passengers freak out. 

Nathan: "We're flying! It's flying!"

Lou: "He's flying the bus."

Angela: "It's a miracle." 

The Tritovore chatters excitedly.

The Doctor lifts them up over the highest dunes

Christina: "What's happening? How are you doing this?"

Doctor: "Antigravity clamps. Didn't I say?"

Christina: "But, do we need to be going this high? The wormhole's down there."

Doctor: "Just gaining a little height to see if we can get a bearing on the swarm."

They rise over the last dune, and there's the swarm, immediately in front of them.

Carmen: "Doctor! They're coming!"

Doctor: "Right! Everybody hang on!"

The Doctor wheeles the bus, guns it, and swoops down through the wormhole just above the sands. The light dims, distortion kicks in, bright light. And the bus bursts out of the wormhole at the tunnel, swooping up and over the heads of the UNIT forces, clearing their line of fire. The soldiers and police watch in amazement.

Barkley: "It's nighttime."

Angela: "We're back home!"

Nathan: "He did it. He did it!"

They flew over night time London, the Doctor steering the bus in a lazy circle, heading back toward the tunnel, and UNIT.

The Sergeant, on the ground, runs toward the scientific van.

Sergeant: "Captain!" He pounds on the door. "Captain, they're back! It's the bus, ma'am, it's come back. And it's flying!"

Inside, Captain Magumbo lowers the gun she's holding on Malcolm. She turns and runs outside, scanning the sky, just in time to see three of the swarm burst through the wormhole.

Captain Magumbo: "Code Red! Fire at will!"

The soldiers open fire at the flying stingrays. The stingrays swoop and dive at them.

Sergeant: "Concentrate your fire!"

As the battle rages outside, the phone rings inside Malcolm's van.

Doctor: (on the phone) "Malcolm, close that wormhole."

Malcolm: "Yes sir." He sits down at his keyboard, much relieved, and presses F8. The circuits spark and burn. "No, no!" He grabs a fire extinguisher and pust out the fire, trying desperately to salvage something. The battle rages outside.

Doctor (yelling out of the phone on the desk) "Malcolm, I need that signal."

Malcolm picks up the phone. 

Malcolm: "It's not working, the computer overloaded!

Doctor: "Malcolm, I need that signal. We've got billions of those things about to fly through."

Malcolm: "Well, what do I do?"

Doctor: "You'll have to do it on manual. Loop it back through the integrator and keep the signal ramping up."

Malcolm: "By how much?"

Doctor: (annoyed) "500 Bernhards. Do it! Now!"

Malcolm puts the signal through, it builds, screaming upward, the wormhole wavers and collapses.

Malcolm: "Yes!"

The other billion of the swarm just miss it as the wormhole closes on San Helios.

On Earth the UNIT troops keep fighting as the three of the swarm who got through continue to try to eat them. The soldiers fight with automatic gunfire, anti-aircraft guns, and the occasional rifle butt as the creatures get too close trying to take a bite.

Captain Magumbo: "Target at 9 o’clock!"

Anti-aircraft guns fire and take down two of the creatures. 

Captain Magumbo: "I don't believe it. Guns that work!"

The last of the creatures flies higher, going after the bus which is circling the area. 

Nathan: "Doctor, it's coming for us!"

The passengers all scream as it bears down on them. The Tritovore Commander clacks angrily and throws his useless gun at it. The monster eats it and keeps coming.

Doctor: "Oh, no you don't"

The Doctor spins the bus and kicks the monster with the back fender. 

Captain Magumbo: "12 o'clock, take it out!"

All UNIT focuses on the beast, peppering it with shots. An anti-aircraft shell hits it and knocks it out of the sky. 

Captain Magumbo: "Cease fire. Arms down."

Up on the bus everyone is clapping and crying with relief.

Christina: (to the Doctor) "Did I say I hated you? I was lying. Thank you." Then she flirts an eyebrow at him. "But you still owe me a gold cup."

The Doctor grins back at her and wheels the bus through a jaunty curve. 

Doctor: "Ladies and Gentlemen, you have reached your final destination. Welcome home." 

The Doctor rings the bus bell as the bus comes down. All the UNIT personnel stop work to stare as the big, red, double-decker bus comes in for a landing.

The Doctor lands the bus at the mouth of the tunnel, in the midst of UNIT's forces. He opens the doors and all the passengers laugh and cry with relief as they scramble to disembark.

The UNIT soldiers shake off their awe and scramble back to their jobs, securing the stingrays corpses, powering down weapons and surrounding the bus, herding the passengers to one side, getting down to the business of cleanup. 

Sergeant: "Welcome back everyone. Step away from the bus, just to be safe. As fast as you can, thank you. As standard Procedure we need to screen you, and then you'll all be taken for debriefing." 

The Doctor and the Tritovore are nearly the last off the bus. 

The Doctor flashes his psychic paper credentials at the Sergeant. "Not me. I don't count." Rifles cock and come up as the soldiers see the alien behind the Doctor. "And neither does he!" The Doctor jumps in front of the alien. "He's with me. Come on." He leads the Tritovore commander away as Lady Christina protests behind him.

Christina: "Oh, but Doctor!"

Sergeant: (grabbing her arm) "This way, please." He escorts her off to the side with the others.

The Doctor walks up to Captain Magumbo, but before he can say anything Malcolm comes rushing out, grinning, and starts shaking his hand.

Doctor: "You must be Malcolm."

Malcolm: (grinning like a maniac) "I've always wanted to meet you, Doctor, and shake your hand." The Doctor looks down wryly to where Malcolm is still shaking his hand.

Doctor: "For what?" the Doctor asks, as the grinning scientific adviser fails to realize he's wringing the Time Lord's arm off.

Malcolm: "For still having a planet to live on, for a start." Malcolm grins like a star struck groupie.

Captain Magumbo: "To your station, Dr. Taylor."

Malcolm comes to with a start.

Malcolm: "Yes ma'am." He gave the Doctor's hand one final wring. "It's been an honor to work with you, Doctor."

Doctor: "And you too, Malcolm."

Malcolm wanders off back to his lab. He stops a passing soldier.

Malcolm: "I shook the Doctor's hand!" he boasts. The soldier looks at the starstruck advisor, then over at the Doctor and the silent alien who is standing behind him. He grins back at the grinning Doctor and goes on about his work.

Captain Magumbo: "Doctor, I salute you, whether you like it or not." She salutes, he grimaces. She grins and put her hand down. "Now, I assume we're safe from those things?"

Doctor: "They'll start again, generate a new doorway. It's not their fault, it's their natural lifecycle. And only a few were lost. The wormhole would have started to destabilize anyway, once enough had gone through, some would end up in deep space, or falling into suns. But enough could get through to be a problem. I'll set up a guard program, nudge the wormholes onto uninhabited planets." 

He leans back against a car, looking at the line of passengers being examined.

Doctor: "Closer to home, see that these people are well taken care of. They helped save the world today, even if it was to save themselves."

Captain Magumbo: "I'll see what I can do. And, I've got something for you." She gestures, and two soldiers pull down a tarp, revealing the Tardis.

Doctor: (strides over to it, laughing) "Oh, ho, better than a bus any day, hello old girl."

Captain Magumbo: "We found it in the gardens at Buckingham Palace."

Doctor: "Oh, she doesn't mind." 

Captain Magumbo: "What about him?" She nods to the Tritovore, who had silently followed along behind the Doctor, among all these humans.

Doctor: "He's not your problem." He addresses the Tritovore, "Commander," he unlocks the Tardis door and holds it open. "If you'll just step in here. It'll take me a few minutes to wrap up some loose ends, then I'll take you home." The alien steps gratefully into the Tardis, the Doctor shuts the door.

Captain Magumbo: "Now, I've got three dead alien stingrays to clear up. I don't suppose you fancy helping with the paperwork?"

Doctor: "Not a chance."

Captain Magumbo: (laughing) "Until we meet again, Doctor."

Doctor: (shaking her hand) "I hope so."

__________

Over in the passenger line, Angela is on the phone, Nathan beside her.

Angela: (into phone) "It's me, I'm back, Suzanne. I'm home." She laughs and turns to Nathan. "She didn't even know I was gone."

Christina: (a UNIT soldier in radiation gear, beeps over her with a Geiger counter) "That's quite enough of that!" She runs out of the line and over to the Doctor. 

Detective: (seeing her) "She is not getting away this time."

Christina: (coming up to the Doctor at the Tardis) "So, is this your spaceship then? It doesn't look very spacey."

Doctor: "You'd be surprised."

Christina: "Right then. Off we go."

Doctor: "No."

Christina: "What?"

Doctor: "I said no."

Christina: "But I saved your life, and you saved mine."

Doctor: "So?"

Christina: "We're surrounded by police. I'll go to prison."

Doctor: "Yeah."

Christina: "But you were right, it's not about money. I only steal things for the adventure and today, with you, I want every day to be like this." He simply looked at her. "Why not?" 

Doctor: "People have traveled with me and I've lost them. Never again."

The Detective arrives. 

Detective: "Lady Christina de Souza, I have waited a long time to say this, I am arresting you on suspicion of theft. You do not have to say anything. Etc. Etc. Dennison, take her away." The police handcuff her and take her away, the Doctor watches, stony-faced.

All the other passengers watch, solemnly, as Christina is taken away, the police lead her to the last line of police cars, beyond the UNIT barricades.

Detective: "And I should arrest you as well, for aiding and abetting!" He points at the Doctor, and waves a hand at the other passengers. He stares mulishly at all the UNIT soldiers, who have gone silent, and obviously aren't about to let that happen. "Bah!" He waves an angry hand at them all and stalks off.

Everyone watches as the Detective supervises the loading of his prisoner into a squad car. The Doctor leans casually around the edge of the Tardis, and takes careful aim with the sonic screwdriver. With a quick buzz, Christina's handcuff's flick open as she is pushed into the squad car. With a surprised look, and a grin at the Doctor through the window, she scoots across the seat, and right out the other side of the car. Before the police know what is happening, she sprints across the remaining lanes of traffic, rolls over the edge of the embankment, and is gone. A group of policemen chase after her. All her fellow passengers laugh and cheer.

The Doctor smiles and pockets the sonic screwdriver, and gives the rude and fuming Detective an arch look. The Detective stomps off.

The Doctor turns around. Soldiers are escorting Lou and Carmen past, to a trailer for debriefing.

Carmen: "You take care now, Doctor."

Doctor: "You too, Carmen. Chops and gravy, lovely."

Carmen: (ominous) "No, you be careful, because your song is ending, sir."

Doctor: (serious) "What do you mean?"

Carmen: (prophesying, each word a lead weight) "It is returning. It is returning through the dark."

The Doctor stares. 

Carmen: "And then, Doctor, oh, but then... He will knock four times."

 

 

Fade out.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think. Thanks.


End file.
